A New Approach to Networking

When it comes to networking events, there are those who love them and others who dread them.

The inability to do these in person right now has forced some opportunities to leverage technology for networking in a different way. I was in an experience that moved people into breakout rooms to meet and discuss topics. It worked pretty well and I met some new people.

As a person who can be overwhelmed by a big ballroom of people all at once, this new approach is easier. It still allows the extroverts to talk to people which they love and it allows the introverts (aka, me) to talk in smaller groups and not be so overwhelmed. It seems like a win-win for everyone.

Regardless of how it occurs, networking is intended to build mutually beneficial relationships for both parties.

Where to Begin With Your New Way to Network

Step one is for you to add value. Listen for a way that you can help the people you are connecting with. You can offer to help them in various ways that are easy to do.

Here are a few examples: send an article, book recommendation, or make a connection for them with someone you know. Connect with them on LinkedIn after you meet them and if you want to have a longer conversation, then you can set that up with them.

Just know, this could be a one-way street. Not everyone believes in the “mutually beneficial” side of networking. They may not do the same in return, but it may come later. Remember what Maya Angelou said, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” This is an opportunity to create a feeling and a connection with them that they won’t forget.

What have you taken away from networking conversations? Can you think of a time when someone did something that added value for you? I bet you remember the person who helped you before you would think about ‘ol what’s his name who didn’t do anything for you. I believe that if you send good out into the world, it will come back to you.

Look for ways to add value to someone else and see what happens. What is the old saying, “It is better to give than receive?” Offer value to someone and you might just see a difference in how it makes you feel too!

The Goal of Networking

The goal is to have people that you can reach out to and leverage, right? It isn’t just to have a bunch of connections that you don’t know who they are and why they are on your list. What if you identify some people that are already on your list that you want to reconnect with instead? You can expand your network one by one and make it higher quality with actual conversations.

What is your goal for the conversation? Do you have a specific ask or need? Do you simply want to reconnect with them? Can you add value to them or connect them to other people that you know? Go in with a value focus and you will always build a stronger relationship with the other person.

Identify 2–3 (or more if you have time) people each week that you want to meet with and reach out to them. If you do this each week you will have 100–150 connections in your network by the end of the year that you actually know and they know you. You are increasing your visibility with them and building a stronger relationship. Make it a point to do this every year. When you add new people, do the same thing and your network will always be strong.

How to Leverage Curiosity for Stronger Networking Conversations

One of my clients, Tom, works on a team and is interested in moving up to a manager role. He said that he wanted to increase his visibility to show his management that he is ready for a promotion. I asked him, “What are you doing now to increase your visibility?”

He responded, “I meet with my manager and my peers on a regular basis. I have made some presentations to my leadership team and received positive feedback for them.”

I asked, “Have you done any networking inside the company with other groups? Have you attended any networking events outside the company?” He said, “I attended a networking event a few years ago and it didn’t go very well. I said hi to people, but I wasn’t sure how to start the conversation, so I stood off to the side and looked at my phone. I would like to learn how to have better conversations.”

Have you ever been in that situation? People like Tom put a lot of pressure on themselves to have the perfect conversation and aren’t sure how to either start or maintain the conversation, so they don’t talk to anyone.

I said to him, “Tom, what if you went into each conversation from a place of curiosity?” He said, “Do you mean that I just ask them a bunch of questions?” I smiled and said, “Yes, ask them questions. However, you are going to come at it from a place of genuine curiosity.” Here are some examples that I shared with him:

• You can start off with “What do you do?” A common question at most networking events, but then you can follow up with “How did you get started in that field? or What do you enjoy most about being in your role or working for your company? or What are the biggest challenges that you face?”
• Another example, “Do you live in the area?” They respond with where they live, and you follow up with, “What do you like best about living there? or How long have you lived there? or Do you have any favorite restaurants or places to visit there?”

What I shared with Tom is a best practice that he could implement right away. Tom said, “I can see how that would generate a different conversation! I can just talk to them like they are a new co-worker or neighbor. I don’t have to over-complicate it or feel pressured to be perfect.”

These questions allow the other person to expand on their answers and share more information with you.

You can learn new things about them that may show you where you could add value to them, connect them with someone else or simply find something in common with them. Go into the conversations with a positive intent and curiosity to learn something fascinating about them. This experience will help you build a stronger relationship and make the other person feel valued.

Do you struggle with networking and want to improve? If you want my help, here is the link to set up a time with me: 30-minute conversation.

Susan M Barber, President of Susan M Barber Coaching & Consulting, LLC, works with individuals, teams, and organizations to build skills that leaders need to attain breakthrough results. Her passion for coaching and leadership development is driven by seeing the transformation of leaders as they reach far beyond their own ideas of success. She continues to drive custom programs for groups that want to make changes in their careers to become more powerful leaders.